Author:
Rating: R
Word Count: 1500
For
Warnings: implied possible past incest, abusive use of dialogue. *g*
Pairing(s): Harry/Fred W/George W
Thanks to
"Harry, mate. Why are you in the corner looking so glum?"
"Yeah, Harry. This is a celebration, Weasley-style!"
"It is a great party, George, honestly. I'm not glum."
"Sure, Harry. Whatever you say. Fred and I have something to show you, partner."
"Er…what is it?"
"Ha, ha. Don't sound so scared, Harry. George here is not going to test it on you or anything!"
"Oh. Ok, what is it?"
"I can't really say here, Harry. You'll have to come outside to the potting shed. Now, now, don't look so worried, mate. Fred and I give our word as Weasleys that no harm will come to you."
"Ha, ha. All right, let's go."
"We'll cheer you up good and proper, won't we George?"
"That we will, Fred. That we will."
******
"Have a seat, mate. Get yourself comfortable there on that stool. "
"All right, you two, what's up?"
"We're concerned about you, Harry. The looks you keep giving Ginny-"
"What? I'm not giving her any..."
"Don't get so excited, mate. As we were saying, we’re concerned, but we understand the situation. The whole family is happy for you both, and we know the reasons why you don't want her in the line of fire."
"The thing is, Harry. The Weasleys are in the line of fire with or without you in our lives."
"How can you say that? I put you all in danger! I can't let Ginny--"
"We know, Harry. We understand. Now you have to understand. We've been watching you at the wedding today, haven't we, George?"
"Indeed, we have, Fred. Harry here is having a hard time keeping himself away from our sister, isn't he?"
"But I'm not--"
"And we feel for him, don't we? All these Veelas floating about, causing temperatures and things to...rise, and Ginny looking so beautiful in her bridesmaid dress, well, I can see how a seventeen year old boy would be having some trouble..."
"Yeah. Trouble. Well said, Fred. And seeing as you've resigned yourself to staying away from said beautiful sister...”
"...she's growing up, our baby sister, isn't she?"
"Yes, she is. And seeing as how you have these huge burdens on you, what with being 'The Chosen One' and all that, George and I have given this some thought, and we think you deserve a little...respite? Is that the word, George?"
"Yes. You, Harry, need some respite from this pressure, and you are not going to let Ginny help you with it, and seem to prefer to carry a dark cloud around on top of you, even at a time of joy like Bill's wedding day--"
"I'm sorry. I'll try harder, I don't want to ruin anyone's day. I--I really miss Ginny, and you’re right, she looks so beautiful today..."
"Listen to yourself. We aren't angry with you. This is exactly what we want to help you with, isn't that right, Fred?"
"Exactly, George. Harry, we have a proposition for you."
"What are you doing?"
"Fred is just trying to relax you, Harry. He really has the best hands. Just let him unwind your shoulders a bit. There now, just let it go."
"We want to make you feel good, mate. We care about you, and we appreciate what you’ve done for the Weasley family. Especially in the case of protecting Ginny; we know what a sacrifice it is for you."
"Honestly, you two! I'm fine. Can we just go back to the party now?"
"Not yet, Harry"
"You are as tense as a board, mate. Seems we have some work ahead of us, don't we Fred?"
"George, what are you doing?"
"George is going to work from the bottom up, Harry, while I have your back, here. Don't worry, his hands are magic incarnate."
"Uhh...I don't know about this..."
"You worry too much. I know those horrible muggles you lived with were not friendly, but the Weasley clan knows the value of touch."
"Guys, I'm not sure what you are trying to do..."
"Relax, we've got you."
"Harry, mate. Do you trust us?"
"Y--yes, of course. With my life."
"Nothing that happens here will leave here, isn't that right, Fred?"
"It'll be between us three only, that's a guarantee, or I'm not a Weasley."
"Er…what will be between the three of us, exactly?"
"Harry, relax. You trust us, then just close your eyes. There, now. That's it."
"George is going to massage your legs, and I will continue with your back and shoulders here and there will be no worries."
"Um...OK."
"You are doing great, Harry. Fred, how are those shoulders up there?"
"Getting better all the time, George, how about you?"
"Harry here has finally let his legs relax for me. Feels good, doesn't it, Harry?"
"Uh-huh."
"..."
"There, now. Isn't that better?"
"Mmmmhmmm."
"We thought so."
"Uh, George?"
"Yes, Harry?"
"What are you doing?"
"Massaging your legs."
"That's not my leg, George."
"Not to worry, Harry. You all right up there, Fred?""
"Right as rain, George. I am going to start massaging your front now, Harry."
"M-my front? What-why?"
"Relax. We want to make you feel good, Harry. Let us, please."
"I don't know about this---what the---oh, my..."
"Y'see Harry? How good that feels? George, good work down there. I think we've hit a soft spot."
"Heh. Yeah, Fred. Mind if I open your trousers, Harry? There's a good lad."
"What the---OH GOD!!"
"There you go, George. I think he likes that."
"Uhhhnnggghh...!"
"Use your tongue a bit more--there, that's it. Mind if I open up your robes up here, Harry?"
"Oh my God..."
"Feel all right, there, mate? Yeah? We knew it would. George has a talented tongue."
“Oh…fuck…”
"…"
“Mmmm. Fred?”
"Yeah, George?"
"Harry here has a lovely cock. Do you want a crack at it before I finish him off?"
"Nah, I'm having fun with his fine chest up here, actually. I rather want to taste these nipples of his, but will have to make do with the fingers for now. Next time, yeah?"
"N-next time?"
"Trust me, Harry. Just once is never enough. You will thank us, later..."
"Right then, back to work!"
"Aggggghhhh! Ohhhhh."
"He's brill, isn't he, Harry? Good ole George."
"Oh fuck! I'm gonna----!"
"Let's hope so, mate. Listen, we wanted to ease you into this, but we have plans for you. This is just a little--"
"Oh-oh-OHHH!"
"...taste of what we have in mind. Easy there, now. That's it, Harry. Don't hold back. We've got you. Get ready there, George."
"OH MERLIN!!!! FUCK!"
"Oh, yeah, that's it. Take it all, George. There you go. I've got you, Harry."
"...Oh, fuck."
"You all right, there? Good work, George."
"Why, thank you, Fred. It was hardly work. I rather look forward to doing it again."
"…"
"Now, that wasn't so bad, was it? Feel better now, Harry?"
"Unh…uh-huh."
"Let me straighten you up here. There you go. All buttoned and spiffed up."
"Uhm. I don't-I don't know what to say."
"There's no need, my boy. Next time, when you feel it's getting to be all a bit too much---"
"Yeah, and you’re having a bad day, or missing Ginny---"
"...just remember to give your faithful business partners a call, yeah?"
"We’ll come running, Harry. And it can be so much better than this."
"Better than this? I don't know, you two. This was pretty fucking good."
"Hah! Did y'hear that, Fred?"
"Sure did. Now, let's get back to the party before anyone misses us, yeah? And Harry, it was entirely our pleasure. Believe me."
"Thank you."
"Don't mention it. Shall we?"
"After you."
*******
"Harry?"
"Yeah? Oh, hey, you guys."
"Harry. You looked like the cat that just swallowed the canary. What's gotten into you?"
"Nothin', Ron. Just happy, is all."
"Oh, Harry, I'm so glad. I was worried about you. You looked so sad all day, and everyone's paired off, and Ginny's---"
"Hermione, don't remind him, okay?"
"No, really guys. I'm fine. Honestly. Better than fine. It's going to be all right. You just wait and see."
"If you're happy, then I'm happy, mate."
"I am happy, Ron. I'm at the Burrow surrounded by the only family that has ever mattered to me. Don't worry."
"That's so great, Harry. Would you like to share a dance with me?"
"Hermione. It would be my pleasure. All right, Ron?"
"Go nuts, mate. Gives me a break. I'll go get us all some drinks."
"Great. Hermione, shall we dance?"
"Oh, my. Yes, we shall. You are positively glowing, Harry."
"Am I? I haven't been this relaxed in ages."
"Well, I am so glad. Whatever it is you are doing, keep it up!"
"Count on it, Hermione. Count on it."
-fin-
If you see any glaring mistakes, please feel free to point them out, I will happily edit. *g*
Cheers!
sick
October 31 2005, 20:19:02 UTC 6 years ago
Just what I needed on this crazy day ... a little Harry/Twins to make everything go down easier.
Pun intended.
-Draconis Leona-
October 31 2005, 20:22:45 UTC 6 years ago
*g*
October 31 2005, 20:36:28 UTC 6 years ago
October 31 2005, 20:56:28 UTC 6 years ago
Cheers!
October 31 2005, 20:41:04 UTC 6 years ago
"That's not my leg, George."
"Not to worry, Harry. You all right up there, Fred?""
Oh my! They're the only words coming into my head. No nonsense!twins/WTF!Harry. Stunning.
October 31 2005, 20:57:44 UTC 6 years ago
Oh, that's a good one. I should edit my pairing notes. Featuring WTF!Harry. HAHAHAHA.
Thanks for dropping by,
Cheers!
6 years ago
October 31 2005, 21:22:39 UTC 6 years ago
October 31 2005, 21:25:56 UTC 6 years ago
*snicker*
Thank you, dear.
November 1 2005, 03:12:13 UTC 6 years ago
Tweasleys and Harry make Barbarella very
hot in the facehot other places toohappy indeed! ;DThanks for that. :)
November 1 2005, 04:04:02 UTC 6 years ago
Cheers!
November 1 2005, 03:26:03 UTC 6 years ago
November 1 2005, 04:04:27 UTC 6 years ago
Cheers!
November 1 2005, 11:48:57 UTC 6 years ago
Crackfic is... crack.
:).
November 1 2005, 16:09:27 UTC 6 years ago
November 1 2005, 13:31:19 UTC 6 years ago
Hee. Brilliant hun. Plus: we all know that potting shed gets way more action in it...*cough*Dumbledore/Harry*cough* What?? Is it my fault HBP gave me waaay too many disturbing ideas? *blink*
November 1 2005, 16:10:35 UTC 6 years ago
Thanks, I hope you got a laugh.
Cheers!
November 1 2005, 14:01:57 UTC 6 years ago
Yay for abusive use of dialogue, this was just great! I so love the twins and they were perfect here! I could SO see them doing that to Harry. *snickers* Thanks for brightening my day. :D
November 1 2005, 16:11:24 UTC 6 years ago
November 18 2005, 03:07:47 UTC 6 years ago
November 18 2005, 03:20:48 UTC 6 years ago
November 20 2005, 06:11:53 UTC 6 years ago
November 20 2005, 07:01:50 UTC 6 years ago
Cheers!
November 26 2005, 07:40:51 UTC 6 years ago
November 26 2005, 07:59:15 UTC 6 years ago
AS you have provided me with so many giggles, it is my honour to have given you at least one back! *grins*
crack!fic. Yay. Thanks.
December 4 2006, 10:21:54 UTC 5 years ago
Harry/Tweasleys FTW!
Crack!fic? Really? Well, whatever this is, loved it. And okay, yes, funny and irreverent and perhaps even a touch bizarre--so okay, crackfic. But if I had to choose one OT3, this is probably it!Oh, and I'm probably blowing up your inbox. I friended you so that you can see my stuff, and I can keep up with all of your awesome postings! (I understand if you don't have the time to reply to all my comments--the fic fests are upon us! :D
PS Thank you for all your Snarry Olympics work; I so enjoy and adore that comm! ;D